Friday, July 06, 2012

Mental Masturbation - Or Khayali Pulao for a family audience..

A month and two days from today, this blog completes 8 years. By the count listed on the blogger dashboard, I have 442 posts completed, this being 443. 443 posts in 95 months is roughly 4 posts a month. I have strived to keep posting once a week, though for the last 8 weeks or so, have been ridiculously lazy. I wish I can blame someone, or something, but as always the fault lies not in my stars but in myself.

But that is not the point of this post. Since Blogger has started keeping track of the pageviews, this blog has also been viewed 14,650 times, which comes to about 150 (or so) times a month. Not bad since I could never have thought that people would want to read what I write. 150 a month, is not quite Andrew Sullivan category, but not bad I say.

Over the last 8 years, I have come to the realization that irrespective of whether you like to read this or not, I truly enjoy writing. But it takes testicular fortitude of an exceptional kind to write for a living – the kind that I only dream of right now. I tried briefly to have a Google Adsense account to track whether I could make a living out of this thing, but in 8 years, my total account accrual was $7.30 and even that I was not eligible for, since I don’t have a US address any more. But if I ever I start seeing more pageviews for this blog, (say maybe 100,000 a month), well you never know..

That said, the pageviews frequency has correlated closely with the frequency of writing. I have had months where I have reached about a thousand or so viewers. Even random people from Russia, Sweden and Argentina have viewed this blog. So there’s probably a lesson there. And (perfect) practice makes perfect. I could really do with some more writing practice.

But then, this is the age of instant gratification. An age of shortcuts. An age where the phrase “minor details” has gained prominence, and people (myself included) take the lift instead of the stairs. Teachers go through Google to set exam papers and students go through the same Google search to get answer keys. Given that I have the responsibilities of an employee, a dutiful husband, a doting father, a responsible son and brother, an MBA student, and a citizen of this world, I really don’t have the time to keep writing random crap that someone may or may not read in order to fulfill my dream of becoming a published author & minor celebrity with 1000 twitter followers. I need a tried and tested method for improving the pageview count so that this blog becomes popular enough to be listed in the celebrity pages. And what’s more, I don’t have time or money to enlist a management consultant, or a branding consultant or a PR representative, or an image management consultant, or whatever the hell people these days do to become popular.

So I am going to do something which I have anecdotal evidence that it works like a charm. This is something I have seen based on whatever websites I visit on the topic, and the PR machine is stupendous. Details are skipped when it comes to this tactic, and reading my Facebook wall is what is the one stop shop to remedying all that ails this country. I am using you, dear reader, as a guinea pig in my experiment to increase the viewership of this blog, that will help me in my selfish motive to become a celebrity. So here goes:

This country needs a strong, dynamic, vibrant, visionary leader like Narendra Modi, even if he is an egotistical, manipulative, insecure maniac.

….. to be continued..

 

No comments: