Saturday, February 11, 2012

Cult Classic - Finding My Religion..

Considering Wikipedia calls it a “pejorative term for a group whose beliefs or practices are considered abnormal or bizarre”, I think I should start a cult.


Because, I have realized that most of my beliefs are what normal people would call bizarre, and therefore one could argue that they are also abnormal.


Here’s what followers of my cult would believe


• God exists. That much we know. In what form, shape and quantity, that we don’t know.


• We don’t plan on knowing either.


• We just need someone to put the blame on, when we don’t know the cause for something that we know happened.


• Almost everything we know about God till now, we suspect we are wrong.


• We don’t believe that humans are children of this God. We have strong reasons to believe that humans are children of other humans.


• However, we do believe all humans are equal. Not in the eyes of God, but in our eyes.


• We don’t believe in any laws which prevent humans from doing what they would like to do, as long as they don’t harm other humans. For instance, laws and processes that prevent humans from freely moving from one place to another are work of the Devil.


• In fact, we hate Visas so much, we prefer MasterCard


• That was just a figure of speech. We don’t know if there is a Devil. We’ve never seen any Devil, plus in our model, we blame God for everything good or bad, so the Devil is somewhat inconsequential.


• We believe that there are only three aspects in life which are true. Art, Science and Emotions. The rest is just noise.


• Our definition of these goes something like this:


Science: Anything we experience that can be replicated


Art: Anything that we experience that cannot be replicated


Emotions: the human response we experience when faced with an instance of Art or Science
• Things like success, failure, fame, fortune, etc. don’t matter much. We’re still not sure if these are a part of science or art. We do know these affect our emotions, so we know that these are either art or science, probably both.


• Since we are a cult, we’re bound to believe that the World will come to an end. But what sets us apart, is that it doesn’t matter to us when the world comes to an end.


• We don’t know if there is a heaven or a hell. That’s a can we prefer to kick down the road. We’ll find out when the world comes to an end, or we come to an end, whichever is first.


• Based on our experience, humans really have no clue about anything. We believe we are human. Therefore, what you read above, are actually our best guesses about what we believe in.


• Whether you agree or disagree, it’s your choice. We don’t have the enthusiasm or outrage to prove to you anything.




Actually the cult is already formed.


But my problem is what to call it??