Friday, December 28, 2007

Ridiculousness, thy name is Times of India

So, Benazir Bhutto is assassinated. A handful of days before an election which could have had serious changes in Pakistani policy, the leading contender in the elections is killed in broad daylight, by gunmen who literally shot her point blank. Instability in Pakistan has generally had a strong correlation with terrorist activities in India (hmmm.. wonder why)

So what does "The Leader Who Guards The Reader" do?

Lead off with 2 full page ads of Dhirubai Ambani's 75th birth anniversary, and have the leader on page 3.

If one ever needed proof that the ToI is beholden to advertisers.

Thoughts from the pot

If Life were an HTML form, friends would be check boxes and relatives would be radio buttons.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Rout Down Under

Here's my (precious) thoughts on the walloping we're going to get in Australia over the next 6 weeks.

- If you're not going to open with Sehwag or Karthik (i.e. your designated openers) shouldn't you ask the guy who you want to accomodate in the lineup to open, that's Mr. Yuvraj Singh. The whole idea of having Dravid open is borderline lunatic. It all boils down to the basic concept. Is Yuvraj Singh a better No. 6 batsman, than Dravid is a No. 3 batsman?

I don't think so.

- The way our team is structured, it begs for an opener who's an all-rounder of some sort. So, I'd make my team something like this.
1. Jaffer,
2. Pathan/Karthik/Sehwag,
3. Dravid,
4. Tendulkar
5. Ganguly
6. Laxman/Yuvraj
7. Dhoni
8/9/10/11 - Bowlers

To me, the way we're going, is wrong. If Dravid's comfortable at 3, he's damn well earned the right to stay there. I'd open with Jaffer and RP Singh to make sure Dravid get's his 3rd spot. If Yuvraj has to wait, he has to wait. If he can't wait, then drop Laxman / Tendulkar / Ganguly / heck, even Dravid. But don't make a bakra out of the man who has won more test matches of his bat than all the others in the lineup combined.

- The bowling's probably going to be a bigger surprise than expected. But even the best bowling options won't win matches if the batsmen don't score. I won't be surprised with a 4-0 blowout, but I think we might draw a game. Just a hunch.

Random musings

Am on a long(ish) vacation. Christmas day and Boxing Day (also known as Wedding Anniversary) are every year standards. Decided that 2 days at home would not be the worst thing in the world. Followed by the weekend, so squeezed a 6 day break on a 3 day vacation. Todays the first (non-standard) day off with no-one around so thought I should get around to doing somethings, I normally don't get to do.

So, what do I go and do? Something I have not done in a long, long time

-- Spend 2 hours and 20 minutes and counting on the internet with music playing loud. Reading magazines, blogs, cricket scores (damn those Aussies, screwed up my vacation), tennis scores, and then some..

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Things I think I think (Year End edition)

-- The big ticket in India right now is Narendra Modi. Honestly, (and I know I am going to get a few nasties back) I think he's a good politician. His "Hindu-card" is fake. He did what any Indian politician would have done in his place. There've been riots every where, and always there's been a political backing for it. And it's not just Hindu-Muslim, we've had Hindu-Sikh, Hindu-Hindu, Bramhin - Dalit, and God knows all other kinds of riots. People really don't bother that much about their identity unless someone instigates it. If anything, I'd even go on a bigger limb and say that Modi winning in Gujarat is the best that could've happened to Sonia Gandhi. She now has a "mascot" for the other side, for the general elections.

"Beta so ja.. Nahin toh Modi aayega"

-- The other big ticket is the Australia series. 4-0 Australia. Anything different is a bonus. Not that we should let them run us over, and I don't think with Kumble as captain that would happen, but I would build the reverse pressure. If Ponting's worlds best ever team cannot beat us 4-0, there's something wrong in this world. Imagine the pressure then, if the best that is possible, is the least that is expected?

-- It's been a great year for us. We moved into our house, we're now 7 months pregnant with our first child, everything seems to be going good (touchwood). Nothing much to ask for in the new year. Health and peace for everyone we know.

That's it.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Thank You All

 To all:
 My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time
 and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months.
 I want to wish each and every one of you a very Healthy and prosperous New
 Year.  Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.
 Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat shit in the glue on
 envelopes, because I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to
 seal an envelope.
 Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.  Because of
 your concern, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet
 stains and may eat my guts out as well.
 I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these
 products are atheist bastards who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.
 I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave, because it causes cancer.  I
 no longer check the coin return on pay phones, because I could be pricked with
 a needle infected with AIDS. I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants,
 even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
 I no longer go to shopping malls, because someone might drug me with a
 perfume sample and rob me.
 I no longer receive packages from, nor send packages by UPS or FedEx since
 they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
 I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number
 for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore,
 and Uzbekistan.


I no longer eat KFC, because their "chickens" are actually horrible
mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.
 I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my
 free replacement pair from Nike.
 I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now
 have their recipe.
 I no longer worry about my soul, because at last count, I have 363,214
 angels looking out for me in addition to all of you dear friends.
 Thanks to you, I have learned that there REALLY  IS a God but he/she
 only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven hundred of my friends and make a wish within five seconds.
 I no longer have any savings, because I gave it to a sick girl who is about
 to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time)...
 I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the
 $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their
 special e-mail program.
 Yes, I want to THANK YOU SO MUCH for looking out for me that I will now
 return the favor!
 So, if you don't send this damn e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the
 next 7 minutes, a large flock of pigeons with a wicked case of diarrhea
 will land on your head at 5:00 PM this afternoon and shit all over you. I
 know this will occur, because it actually happened to a friend of my next
 door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's third cousin's
 Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

Sunday, December 02, 2007

Doing your bit for women's empowerment

Women's education is the best solution, I am told for empowering women. I beg to differ. I have a slightly differing approach. Instead of degrees, I would encourage women to get driver's licenses and have the ability to drive and see different places.

There's plenty of women I know who have completed college, have had careers for years now, but still don't like their kids to mix with "that Muslim kid" or "that kid of gay parents". I am willing to bet the female bus driver is a lot more open minded than the female bank clerk who's travelling in her bus. If your daily routine involves going from one place to another, chances are your sphere of exposure is a lot better than sitting at home / in an office, irrespective of what you learned in college. If you are going from place to place, very soon you'd be driving yourself, instead of taking a bus / auto / cab.

I agree it brings the risk of more women drivers on the road (oh, come on.. you know what I mean), and it might screw up the environment with more vehicles on the road, but socially I think it would make a bigger difference.